I thought we would live in our house forever.
I imagined my kids and their friends at Prom, high school graduation, and mentally picked out their potential future boyfriends and girlfriends.
But then life happened and my husband accepted a job in a new city 1000 miles away.
Telling the Kids We are Moving
I’ve always been an open book. Plus, my face is pretty transparent so I have a hard time keeping anything from my friends, and most certainly, my kids.
But how do you tell the kids that we are moving (and in the middle of the school year) without completely breaking their little hearts?
I turned to my trusted Google and researched this topic extensively. These are some of my takeaways:
Turn the Move into an Adventure
My daughter worries. A lot.
I read not to say, “We have news.” This creates anxiety.
I had already tried that approach with friends and even with them, they immediately jumped to their own erroneous conclusions: Are you pregnant? Are you getting divorced?
I knew the responses I would get from my kids: they each want another sibling, another puppy, and who knows what else. So, instead, we came right out and said it, with as much excitement as we could muster:
“We’re moving to Minneapolis!”
My son kept repeating, “No, really?” Was that anger, denial, or happiness? We couldn’t tell.
Finally, he jumped up, ran upstairs and announced, “I’m going to FaceTime everyone and let them we are moving!” Definitely excitement.
I should preface that my husband grew up in Minneapolis, his parents live there, as does his brother and family, and my kids go there multiple times a year.
My daughter instead sat silently. I knew the questions would come later.
Get Them Involved
My husband and I love looking at houses. Even after living in our home for years, we still check Zillow frequently. If we’re not binging on a show, we’re watching HGTV.
We already had a few houses in mind. We showed them to our kids. They announced their favorites, picked out their rooms in each house, and now talk about them as if they are ours.
I’m trying to be the rock.
My daughter reacted as I predicted. Beginning that night and over the course of the next week, she started to process the information.
“I don’t want to move.”
“Why do we have to move?”
“Everyone’s saying that my friendship with X will break up.”
“I like driving around in the car and knowing where we are.”
She cried a few times that first week. Now, she talks about the move in the definitive. When my son tells her about something going on his grade, she reminds him that she’ll be in a different school when she gets to that grade.
My son says he will feel sad when we get there. As for now, he’s still excited about the adventure.
I’m not going to lie, this move is stressful, especially on me.
My husband already moved and started his new job.
My skin is revolting. My hair needs some TLC. My workout routine is shot.
On a positive note, with constant showings, my house has never been cleaner. In fact, I may never tell my kids when we are under contract (wink, wink). You know what, they can make their beds and put laundry away. Who knew?
But living in limbo is not a fun feeling.
During a showing the other night, I sat in a supermarket parking lot, kids and dog in tow. They did their homework, illuminated by the interior car lights. And, of course (because why not add more drama to our lives) the car battery died. Everyone fell apart as we waited for AAA to come and jump my car.
Midwestern State of Mind
I’m a native New Yorker. My parents are native New Yorkers. My family still lives here. My best friends live here. I know I’ll be back.
I’ve heard all about Minnesota Nice and New Yorkers are anything but. It’ll be an adjustment.
My kids will make friends at school. My husband will make friends at work.
Me, on the other hand? I work from home. I work out at home. I can go days without seeing anyone. Most of my friends from the last decade came from the baby and or preschool days. Making new friends is going to take some effort on my part.
So, if you live in Minneapolis, hit me up! I’ll be there soon.
You can find it all on my Amazon shop.
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I’d love to hear about your experiences moving with your family. Please comment below and/or find me on our Facebook Page.